Fotballsitater

Sitater fra fotballens verden

Ian Wright: "The referee was booking everyone. I thought he was filling in his lottery numbers."

Chris Turner: "I've told the players we need to win so that I can have the cash to buy some new ones."

George Best: "I spent a lot of my money on booze, birds and fast cars. The rest I just squandered."

Bryan Robson: "If we played like that every week we wouldn't be so inconsistent."

Brian Moore: "Newcastle, of course, unbeaten in their last five wins."

David Acfield: "Strangely, in slow motion replay, the ball seemed to hang in the air for even longer."

Bill Shankly: "'If you are first you are first. If you are second you are nothing."

Gerry Francis: "What I said to them at half time would be unprintable on the radio."

Ian Rush: "I couldn't settle in Italy - it was like living in a foreign country."

Mick Lyons: "If there weren't such a thing as football, we'd all be frustrated footballers."

Bobby Charlton: "It was a fair decision, the penalty, even though it was debatable whether it was inside or outside the box."

Mike Channon: "Believe it or not, goals can change a game."

Tony Gubba: "So often the pendulum contines to swing with the side that has just pulled themselves out of the hole."

Derek Johnstone: "He's one of those footballers whose brains are in his head."

Ron Atkinson: "Well, Clive, it's all about the two M's - movement and positioning."

Berti Vogts: "If I walked on water, my accusers would say it is because I can't swim."

Richard Moller Nielsen: "Love is good for footballers, as long as it is not at half-time."

Mike Gray: "Well Kerry, you're 19 and you're a lot older than a lot of people younger than yourself."

Dean Holdsworth: "The only way we will be going to Europe is if the club splash out and take us all to EuroDisney."

Jim Sherwin: "It was a good match, which could have gone either way and very nearly did."

Sara Thomas: "Am I really trying or am I just that damn good?

Martin Tyler: "Oh, he had an eternity to play that ball, but he took too long over it."

Danny Blanchflower: "Everything in our favor was against us."

Radio 5 Live: "The score is Sunderland nil, Leicester nil, the temperature is nil and the entertainment value is not much above nil."

Javier Clemente: "This is an unusual Scotland side because they have good players."

Brian Moore: "And now we have the formalities over, we'll have the National Anthems."

Peter Jones: "Ian Rush, deadly ten times out of ten, but that wasn't one of them."

Jimmy Greaves: "He hit the post, and after the game people will say, well, he hit the post."

Sara Thomas: "You had a chance until I stepped on the field."

Bill Shankly: "Football's not a matter of life and death ... it's more important than that."

Jimmy Armfield: "I think you and the referee were in a minority of one, Billy."

Howard Wilkinson: "I am a firm believer that if you score one goal the other team have to score two to win."

The Guardian Newspaper, London, England; describing a meeting of English soccer superstar David Beckham and Nelson Mandela, the president of South Africa, as an encounter between: "an icon of his generation, adored by millions across the globe, who has brought hope to his nation where there was once despair...and Nelson Mandela."

Sara Thomas: "In soccer there are no time outs, helmets, shoulder pads, commercial breaks, half time extravaganzas so, if that's what you need...go play football you big wuss!

Bill Shankly: We absolutely annihilated England. It was a massacre. We beat them 5-4."

Paolo Diogo, Portuguese soccer player who lost a finger when he caught his wedding ring on a fence while celebrating a goal for his team: "When I jumped down from the fence, I didn't feel anything at all. The first time that I noticed that something was missing from my hand was when it started to hurt. And it hurt tremendously." Note: Team officials were able to find the missing finger but surgeons were unable to reattach it. To make matters worse, the referee cited Diogo for excessive celebration.

David Beckham, talking about his son Brooklyn: "I definitely want him to be christened, But I don't know into what religion yet."

Søker skribenter

The Zone Norge søker skribenter. Vi trenger dere der ute til å hjelpe oss. Om det er ønskelig så kontakt meg på hihm1a@gmail.com

Sånn det ser ut idag så skal vi prøve å få ut en avis en ca en gang hver måned.

 

Fast skribent

Vi søker skribenter som kan bidra på månedlig basis. Dette forutsetter at en artikkel eller mer leveres til hver utgave av avisen. Om noen ønsker å prøve seg som redaktør så er også dette mulig. For å få til det må du ha litt disiplin, må kunne mase på dine skribenter og ha tid til å "fikle" med control-sidene. Her kreves det en viss seriøsitet.

Blir du en fast skribent så følger det også med et klubbmedlemsskap, samt noen powertokens hver uke. Dette er godtgjørelse for jobben du vil legge ned.

 

Freelancer

Om noen har lyst tar vi også imot enkeltartikler. Er det noe du har lyst til å skrive om og få det utgitt? Da kan The Zone være stedet.

 

Intervjuer til The Zone

Jeg ser også etter dere som vil være med i følgende artikler: Kommende storlag, head-to-head og intervju(gjerne en litt erfaren bruker). Om du har lyst til å stille opp så kontakt meg på mailen som står oppi der. Ser frem til å høre fra deg!

Humor

"Oppfinneren av Harley- Davidson MC'en kom til himmelen, og snakket med Gud...
-Si meg... Er det ikke du som har oppfunnet kvinnen?

-Jo, svarte Gud.
-Du må innrømme at du har laget noen konstruksjonsfeil:
1. for tung foran.
2.bråker på tomgang.
3.bakenden slenger.
4. eksosen sitter for tett inntil innsuget.
- Det er mye mulig at det er noen feil, svarte Gud. - Men statestikkene viser at det er mange flere som rir på min oppfinnelse enn din. "


Det var to murere som jobber i øverste etasje på Radison Hotell.
Mens de jobber og svetter finner den ene ut at han må pisse.
Det var ingen do i nærheta så han spurte den andre om råd. - Ta å gå ut på den planken som ligger å tipper ved ballkongen. Jeg skal stå bak og holde den oppe, så kan du gå ut på kanten å pisse ned.
Folk vil tro det regner og ikke merke seg ved det. - Men lover du på tro og ære at du ikke slipper da? - Ja selvfølgelig din dust.
Mannen gikk bortover planken, tok tak rundt gopinnen og gjorde seg klar til å tømme vannet av potetene.
Arbeidskameraten trår på en spiker og hopper til sides i ren refleks så den tissetrengte mannen faller mot bakken.
Ei dame som bodde i 9ende etasje ser det hele og roper til mannen sin:

- Du Lars, nå falt det ned en homo!
- Hvordan kan du vite at det var en homse? spør mannen. - Jo, han holdt rundt kødden og ropte; Hvor ble det av det jævla rasshølet!!

Kelneren: - Skal De ha gul eller brun ost på rundstykkene?
Gjesten: - Spiller ingen rolle, Jeg er fargeblind.

Da fikk han spørsmål av programlederen om når 2. Verdenskrig slutta, enten i 1918, eller i 1945.
-Nja, dætta vart vanskelig, syns'n... -Du kænn itte gi meg no hint a`?

-Nei, vær så snill a, gi meg ett alternativ tell!"

 

hihm1a

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10